War…

Couple of pals chatting to each other in their home…
J – Christ, the news is so bloody depressing innit George?! You think we’ll ever stop warring with each other?
G – What? Me and thee over the last pack of crisps when we’ve got the munchies?!
J – You pillock! I mean us as a race of people, you know, humans. I despair sometimes, especially when the sodding news is on
G – Think I know what you mean. Shall we put “Civil war” on then, set the mood for one of our great debates?
J – Yeah, why not? Axl’s right man. What’s so civil about bloody war?!
G – Did you know that the yanks spend $353 billion on arms out of a global figure of $789 billion?
J – Bugger me George. You’re full of useless information like that! Where’d you dig that one up then?
G – Oh, just googled it one day, found that on good ol’ Wikipedia didn’t I? It also mentioned that there’s 172 000 war deaths globally and it had a note that they didn’t occur in the USA!
J – Edwin Starr was right…
Both singing – WAR! What is it good for? Absolutely sodding NOTHING…!
J – I ain’t seen you playing any of your wargames lately George.
G – Wargames? That’s a film with Matthew Broderick in it innit!?
J – HoHoHo, very drole!! Reckon your “Assassins Creed” has weeks of dust on it!
G – Yeah, it’s you man. Got me thinking why the fascination with war, blood, guts? Decided recently I don’t wanna be like all them out there. Should be more love in the world.
J – Yeah, Cindy at number 13! Phwoar! I’d do some love there, I can tell ya!!!
G – Trust you bringing it all back down to base level! Mind you, Jennifer Aniston springs to mind for me!!!
J – Meanwhile, back in the so called civilised world, there’s all them youths on the street who reckon they get respect by being ‘tooled’ up so they can defend themselves.
G – And I thought it was cars that balanced out the size of some guy’s penises!!

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